Today I was referred to do makeup/hair/styling for a photo shoot for the band Sparks The Rescue
much appreciation to Phill M www.Phillm.com for that.
I did kind of an over the phone interview with the woman from Fearless Records who is setting up the photo shoot.
Apparently they think this band is gonna be big, so that's exciting.
This will be their first real photo shoot
there will be behind the scenes video and photos taken.
great exposure for me.
I'm bringing my sister to help with hair,
she graduates from Vidal Sassoon in July, so I'm helping build her resume.
this is a gateway job,
as is every opportunity to work with new photographers/bands/record labels.
I've already done a music video for A Static Lullaby, who is also on Fearless Records
and Sparks the Rescue is on tour with The Dangerous Summer, a band whose video I am doing next week.
If the shoot on Sunday goes well, they said they'd use me for other upcoming stuff they have.
I'm getting a decent amount of money for this and they said I would possibly have the chance to work on bigger budget stuff in the future.
besides having this shoot on Sunday,
I have 4 music videos to do in the next two weeks.
2 videos for And Then There Were None, shooting Monday and Tuesday
Impending Doom shooting on April 5th
and The Dangerous Summer on April 6th.
I'm getting paid for all of it.
so fucking stoked!
I can't wait to go shopping haha.
Courtney turns 19 tomorrow
my sisters are so grown up now, it's crazy.
It doesn’t leave feelings of anger, jealousy, or regret.
Letting go isn’t about winning or losing.
It’s not about pride and it’s not about how you appear, and it’s not obsessing or dwelling on the past.
Letting go isn’t blocking memories or thinking sad thoughts, and doesn’t leave emptiness, hurt, or sadness.
It’s not about giving in or giving up.
Letting go isn’t about loss and it’s not about defeat.
To let go is to cherish the memories, but to overcome and move on.
It is having an open mind and confidence in the future.
Letting go is learning and experiencing and growing.
To let go is to be thankful for the experiences that made you laugh, made you cry, and made you grow.
It’s about all that you have, all that you had, and all that you will soon gain.
Letting go is having the courage to accept change, and the strength to keep moving.
Letting go is growing up.
It is realizing that the heart can sometimes be the most potent remedy.
To let go is to open a door, and to clear a path and set yourself free.”
goodbye.
i just had the meanest things ever said to me today.
goodluck with your lives.
hopefully you all actually become successful
and maybe some of you will eventually have better things to do besides talk about how I look.
Obviously I don't know who left the anonymous comment in my truthbox,
but I'm pretty sure it was someone I've seen recently,
so i'm just done with everyone for now.
I was gorgeous even when I had a "skeletal deformity,"
and I am still gorgeous now that it's fixed
if you think otherwise, well then good for you.
Everyone has their flaws,
whether it's your body, eyes, nose, face, skin, teeth, hair, addiction, dependency, low self esteem, bad posture, bad tattoos, bi-polar disorder, or whatever else people don't like about themselves.
deal with your own insecurities instead of trying to affect mine.
growthefuckup, thanks.
Note to self: get over it. let go.
Ugh hope whatever shitty mood I'm in goes away soon.
I didn't sleep well last night.
I haven't been sleeping well at all lately actually.
I haven't been able to sleep through the night for a while.
ugh.
I'm still just put off by a few things right now
whatelseisnew.
we'll see how this weekend ends up going.
I might be making a couple changes to my life afterwords after some re-evaluation.
It's 6pm and I have literally only eaten 3 little chocolate egg shaped candies.
I'm like never hungry any more, which is weird.
blahblahblah
this is a pointless entry.
oh well.
Time to go grocery shopping so I can feed the boys when they come over haha
-S.
So I just had a complete crying breakdown while i was on the phone with my mom
so many things are getting to me right now
it just all kind of built up and i needed to let it out
i've been keeping a lot of stuff to myself lately and it's been hard for me.
anyway-
today Caitlin and I did I See Stars' new music video.
originally we were just going to do the makeup for it, but we ended up being in it.
like legitimately being in it because they decided not to use the other girls that had chosen to be in the video.
haha
it was awkward because it was a spur of the moment thing but hopefully it turns out alright.
we just shot some stuff down on Hollywood Blvd... where the tourists hangout. haha
We just had to laugh and hangout with a few other people and just basically pretend we were just all friends kickin it in Hollywood..
I was sexual harassed, verbally, by an Elvis impersonator in front of the Chinese Mann Theatre..
we had to pose with all the people dressed up in costumes out there and he was saying the most sexually explicit, disturbing-things to the 3 of us girls.... haha like SERIOUSLY.
I was ultra creeped out.
other than that, it was a chill day
the band was nice, mostly highschool-aged guys.
Music video #5 complete!
Caitlin and I were presented with the opportunity to work on Silverstein's new music video next week.
The only catch is it's being filmed in Canada.. and we would have to pay our way there
I was able to talk my parents into paying for my flight though, and the crew is all staying in a cabin together
so i don't have to worry about expenses for that.
MTV is going to be filming behind the scenes footage while were there, so that's another reason why i wanted to go.
hopefully it means the video is going to be a big deal
they're a big band, so it's a pretty awesome opportunity.
and right now i'm just trying to do everything I can to build my resume
the A Static Lullaby video has gotten a lot of recognition and things are starting to get busy for Robby,
which means things are going to be busy for us.
this is a career where I have to put in money to eventually make money
so this is one of those situations.
Hopefully it all works out.
Things are getting really busy.
This weekend/next week will be insane, but hopefully FUN!
tomorrow is my only free day
i have to get some shit done and get things ready
saturday I'm going to Bakersfield to see Mozart Season and party at Caitlin's
Sunday the boys are staying with me
and then if all goes as planned, Monday-Thursday I will be in freezingfuckingcoldsnowing Canada haha
I'm still in an off mood from my mega cry sesh
and a few other things aren't helping my mood
sometimes I really miss having a "go to" person to talk to about shit.
whatevs.
i'm gonna try to sleep off this sad panda mood.
goodnight sugarplums
-S.
Updates:
I bought a new camera yesterday, since my old one decided to not hold a charge anymore.
Canon SD 1100 in pink, came with a pink photo printer for about $230 sweeeet deal.
My mom bought it for me since I generously gave my 12yr old sister 6 pairs of designer jeans that I don't wear anymore. haha
She got the better end of the deal, but I'm not complaining.
I'd rather have the camera haha.
I had the spongy thing removed from my nose yesterday
my swelling has gone down more, thankfully, because I really didn't want to work on Thursday with a fat face.
It's not back to normal by any means, but I don't look like I should weigh 300lbs anymore,
haha but I still have a babyface hardcore.
I'm not really in pain anymore, well not like I was before, so that's always good.
The doctor gave me some stretching exercises to do to try and get my mouth to open all the way again.
i have to push my teeth apart with my fingers for 10 sec at a time and repeat it at least 15 times a day
apparently you're supposed to be able to open your mouth wide enough to fit 3 fingers
i'm at about one and a half right now.
(yes this sounds sexual. yes that's all i was thinking about when he was explaining this to me. haha )
Anyway...speaking of work-
Thursday I am doing makeup for I See Stars' new music videos for "3D" & "What This Means To Me"
working 12pm-12am.
I'm excited, I love doing videos, I love being on set and I really like the crew I work with.
I'm slowly being compensated monetarily, so that's always a plus haha.
My sister and I have been having a movie marathon the past couple nights:
Changeling- good, but sad
Zack and Miri Make a Porno- hella funny.
Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist- totally cute
The Boy in the Striped Pajamas- SAD, but good.
Wanted- super entertaining.
Australia- we watched like 20-30 min of it and turned it off haha it's weird. idk.
How to Lose Friends and Alienate People- it was alright, kinda long.
Tomorrow Caitlin and I are going to a screening of the movie Last House on the Left
hopefully it's good.
I haven't seen her since I graduated at the end of January
so it'll be good to have my partner in crime back
She will be the first friend of mine to see the "new" me since most of the swelling has gone down.
it'll be interesting to see her reaction.
I'm anxious about seeing all of my friends' reactions really.
it's going to be weird to get used to.
hmm I think that's all I've got for now.
I'm too lazy to post pictures, maybe next time.
shower, then sleep.
goodnight!
yesterday I had surgery on my nose to fix my deviated septum.
the dr wasn't able to just push it back into place
so he had to re-open the incision under my lip, that had already healed from my jaw surgery, and fix it that way.
apparently it was like more deviated than he thought and he had to actually remove a piece of cartillage.
gross.
thank god I was under anesthesia and asleep for the whole thing..
well, almost.
I woke up towards the end and I don't know if I could actually feel pain, or if I was just aware that they were still working on me.
but I know I was conscious at the end of it..
I felt like shit for most of yesterday, obviously.
my nose has been bleeding on and off out of both sides...
my right nostril has this spongey tampon looking thing shoved in it..
which started white and has now been soaked with blood and whatever other fluid my nose has been leaking..
cute, I know.
the sponge thing stays in until monday, meaning we have to drive baaackkk to sacramento
haha that drive is really getting old..
my face is super swollen again.
after the swelling had gone down a significant amount, bummer.
my nose is all pushed up and huge.
no bruising on my face, just on my arm where the IV was, and it's a gnarly bruise too haha
we left from my appointment yesterday to head straight back to LA.
I slept most of the way in the car, hopped up on prescriptions of 800mg motrin and T3, tylenol w/codeine, not to be confused with the movie. haha.
I have a ridiculous amount of painkillers at my house, in addition to the valium and the anti-biotics
I have like my own little pharmacy haha.
at least the doctor took the acrylic splint that was wired to my top teeth off.
so at least I don't talk with a ridiculous lisp anymore,
and for the first time I can actually see how my teeth fit together
it's pretty amazing
but strange at the same time.
I can't believe it's already been a whole month since my surgery.
craazzy.
back to sleep.
I've been in bed all day.
i'll post gnarly pics tomorrow maybe haha
-S.
So yesterday was a pretty exciting day for me
A Static Lullaby's video for "Toxic" premiered on MTV2
and was featured on the MTV.com and MTV2.com homepages.
I got to actually see it play on TV, which I was totally stoked about.
It's pretty neat to see something I worked on be that big of a deal.
Everyone involved worked really hard that day.
I'm even in a few frames of the video (mostly a few quick background shots, but there are some of me doing makeup)
haha pretty sweeeet.
I've decided to keep using this public blog for most of my posts.
Obviously I'll use the private blog for things I don't feel like sharing with the entire online world.
haha
Heading up to Sacramento tomorrow
and then getting my deviated septum fixed on Thursday.. hopefully the recovery for that goes quickly.
I've got shit to do coming up and being swollen and having black eyes is not really going to be flattering.. but then again, neither is a crooked septum.. and I'd love to be able to breathe out of both sides of my nose again.
haha
so I guess I just need to suck it up and deal with it!
that's all for now
-S.
I'm sick of being pale.. I want my tan skin back haha
where is the warm weather at??!?!?!
I want to go to the beach dammit.
Come on sun, it's March.
come out and play!
p.s
this made my day:
So I've been cleaning my house for like the last week straight.
