Make Yourself

So I've been cleaning my house for like the last week straight.

Granted, I've also slept a lot and watched tv, but I've been doing a lot of cleaning.

Mainly because my cats ended up with fleas and I had to clean EVERYTHING in my house as well as set off flea bombs.

But I've managed to de-flea the cats and the house.

I've literally washed almost every sheet, towel, and article of clothing I own. haha

I probably went a little overboard, but it makes me feel less worried.. plus I didn't want all that chemical shit from the bug bombs on my clothes and stuff.

Anyway, I am STILL trying to organize and clean.

Besides the flea issue, it's time for some (early) spring cleaning.

My makeup gear is spread all through out the house since school has ended and I just need to organize things in general.

My room is nearly spotless, and I really need to try and keep it that way... not likely to happen unfortunately. haha.

I also need to get everything cleaned up and organized because I will be having Mozart Season stay with me while they're on tour.

That should be a blast, as long as my house doesn't get trashed haha.

I'll be back up to Sacramento Wednesday night and getting my deviated septum fixed on Thursday.

And then once again, I will probably be swollen and in pain.

I'm ready to be all healed and recovered!!

I'm starting to stress about what I'm going to do when my lease is up in July.

My sister might be moving to my parent's place in OC, but I definitely want/need to stay around L.A.

I would love to stay where I live now, unfortunately it's ridiculously expensive.

$1950 for a 2bdrm/1bath.. although it is huge..1400 sqft

I need to get a job and be able to pay for most of my own rent, but there's no way I'll be able to afford to pay even half of that, nor do I want to spend that much money on rent.

Realistically, I shouldn't even be stressing about this now.

I have a while before I really need to start worrying.

I just get overwhelmed really easily.

At least I know I have a few options of things I can do.

Caitlin and I were discussing all of this today

I made a joke about how I need to get a boyfriend and get him to move in with me and split my rent

and then I realized how terrified I am of living with a boyfriend. hahaha

I've had boy roommates before, but I've never lived with anyone I was dating.

That kind of commitment just freaks me out for some reason.

Maybe because I've never been in a relationship that ever got that far or lasted long in general

I dunno.

But as much as I love waking up next to someone and all that cutesy bullshit,

I love having my own space, and freedom.

I don't know if I could handle being around someone that much.

So maybe I could live with a boyfriend if he had his own room? :-/

who knows.

maybe it's not as scary as I think it is.

I guess one day I'll find out.

Random thoughts of the day

back to getting shit done.

-S.